Yesterday was my 3rd wedding anniversary. I was reflecting on how blessed I am to have my husband, especially after all we have been through.

Almost 3 years ago I lost my son Jake to suicide. Ben was a great stepfather and had been in my son’s life for several years. The loss has devastated us both. I still wake up and have trouble believing my baby is gone. Jake had been hospitalized twice in two months for suicidal ideation and both times he was released in only 5 days. The insurance company would not pay for a longer stay, even though Jake needed it. After our loss, I needed a purpose. I needed to make sure no one else would be denied care. I didn’t want any other family to know our loss. When I spoke to Ben about wanting to push for insurance parity legislation, to ensure no one was without care, Ben was absolutely on board. When I came to him about starting The JEM Foundation he was there. He didn’t hesitate. He attends meetings, educates people, fights for those that don’t have a voice, supports parents of children with mental illness, helps with campaigns and programs, and most importantly he listens to people; he doesn’t just talk about love, he shows it. He fights side by side with me trying to get mental health legislation passed. He loved Jake dearly and he didn’t have to do this with me, but he lovingly stepped in feet first. Running a charity is difficult, and frustrating, yet he never complains. He helps me to focus on the wins and has faith that we will be able to fund the charity, times I am exasperated by politicians, he reminds me of the lives already saved. I don’t tell him how amazing he is nearly enough. I thank him often, but he deserves so much more, even though he won’t see it that way.

Life is short. I know all too well that things can change in an instant. Don’t let a day go by without telling your loved ones how much they mean to you. If you have a true life partner, listen to their needs and do your best to fulfill them, even if you don’t always want to go see that movie or go to that restaurant. Focus on the blessings and the wins, and not the disappointments. I promise you will be a better person for it and your relationship will benefit from it greatly.